Anonymous asked:

you used to be trans? .-.


I feel like the idea of being trans fit me growing up, everywhere I searched online told me that transitioning was the “cure” for my body issues. Of course what no one told me, was that I really just wanted a way to escape being female. And it was certainly no coincidence that I felt like becoming a “boy” after going online and seeing how other women were retiring their gender roles. No coincidence that my confusion started immediately after I was sexually abused, and after I was told by my family that I wasn’t allowed to like girls. It seemed like a great way to be free of abuse from men, and be “allowed” to like girls without the stigma. I was secretly binding my chest, stuffing, and “identifying”as male online. I was determined to transition “for real” once I turned 18, but luckily by then my Gender dysphoria no longer existed. Or rather, I realized what was really going on.

In reality, I didn’t hate my body but how my body was read by others, and how they treated me because of that. How others saw me not as “gender non conforming” but “a girl in the wrong body, not like other girls, tom boy” is why I thought I had to be trans. This trauma was the root cause, there wasn’t anything innately wrong with me. Having this fundamental understanding, was the only treatment that actually helped me. Not sitting in a therapist chair, not undergoing surgery to cure a MENTAL disorder, not taking synthetic hormones; this is the kind of treatment that is not going to make anybody any money, doesn’t serve any male agendas. 

The radical idea that maybe, our bodies don’t need “fixing”. My experience is not unique, hence why I’m comfortable posting it. It might help someone going through the same thing, it might comfort them to know there are women who have gone through de-transition who are here to support them. Otherwise I wouldn’t of gone through the trouble of posting a long answer for such a short question, but I felt it had to be said.